10-wonderful-lessons-from-mother

Mother’s Day is a special day for most people. I work in the payments industry and it’s the biggest spending day! Even bigger than Black Friday! Imagine that!. Suffice it to say, it’s an extra special day for some very special people; mothers.I did some research among my friends to gather info on what stands out in their minds as the greatest lesson they have learnt from their mothers. Responses were along the lines of advice on relationships, money, and life in general. I pulled all of that together as there are common threads in some. By the way, my sample was from both male and female. Some mothers are still here and making an impact, others have gone on to a better place and have left behind a lasting legacy. Below I share 10 wonderful lessons from mothers(in no particular order).SelflessnessSome of us can attest to mothers who would give their last ounce of effort just to ensure that their children’s basic needs were met. They would deprive themselves, not just physically, but also of their hopes and aspirations,  just so that we could have what we need to succeed. In some cases it was those extra funds to pay for the extra classes to prepare for exams, it could be that school trip, you name it.My friend recalls how her mother(who was a teacher) used to give guided tours to visitors to the island to make extra money…

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mommy-fail-moments

I’m not sure, maybe because Mother’s Day is coming, but I feel like I’m in full on mommy mode as far as my blog is concerned. I read a post from a fellow Jamaican blogger yesterday and it also added a little fuel to that fire. Made me start thinking of my “mommy fail moments”. I hope I’m not the only one who has had them.I don’t think I am alone in this, but everything I do, every decision I make, every moment of the day, I think about my son. How my choices will affect him, am I raising him the “right way”, and by right way I mean in a way that will be suitable and effective for him. And don’t confuse this with meaning that I want to do for him what he likes, because that’s not it. My primary goal above all is to equip him for life so he is able to function and make good choices no matter what life throws at him. Help him develop good coping skills.Fail #1My son’s preschool has an annual trike-a-thon. This was a day when you would bring in their tricycles to school so they could ride to collect funds on behalf of St Jude’s Children Hospital. The day came, I dropped him to school and totally forgot to take his trike. I spoke with his morning teacher and she said not to worry…

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conversations-with-my-son-why-did-you-get-a-red-star

Those of you that have kids in kindergarten might be familiar with the behavior reporting system that some teachers implement to keep them in line and to keep parents abreast of how they are doing behavior-wise on a daily basis. My son’s classroom has a clip system, where they start out in the middle on “ready to learn” and they can either go up or down depending on how they do on that day. The best possible is “outstanding” (pink star) and the worst possible is “parent contact”(red star).My son has had a pretty difficult week this week(not sure what’s happening), and he ended the week with a red star. Of course he came home knowing that we would not be happy about that and went straight to sleep.Now as a (good) parent, you want your child to do well and be the best version of themselves. In a country where your color determines how you are perceived, you don’t want to give fodder to that viewpoint(this is real people). You want to raise a strong black man, who is able to maneuver successfully despite the odds that are stacked against him.QuestionsHow do you bring that out in your child without breaking his spirit, without him losing himself and who he innately is? How do you reinforce positive behaviors while correcting the bad ones?Parenting StylesI have been doing some research on parenting styles and how they can…

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easter-traditions-jamaica-vs-usa

It’s Easter! Celebrated in many different ways by many different people. Cherished traditions are passed down through generations, focusing on different aspects of the holiday. It’s very strange to me that Good Friday and Easter Monday are not national holidays here in the US like it is in Jamaica and other parts of the world. It’s a normal day for work and school just like any other. That threw me for a loop when  first came here. How could that be?The root of Easter lies in the celebration and resurrection of Jesus Christ. For those of us of faith, this will be the focus of the holiday  however it is celebrated. I will be focusing on a couple Jamaican Easter traditions that I miss and some differences in traditions between how Easter is celebrated in Jamaica and US.FishDuring my childhood, apart from Christmas, this was one of the most anticipated holidays. It’s usually a time when friends and family get together over the long Easter weekend(from Good Friday straight through to Easter Monday). Starting from Ash Wednesday, in observance of Lent, people would give up something for 40 days until Easter. That was mainly along the lines of meat and such. As a result, fish became a main staple during Easter. Our meals almost always contained fish prepared by either frying, steaming, roasting, whatever. Just know, you’re going to have fish. Living on an island made this easy, but as with…

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truth-about-parents

Being a parent is one of the most unique undertakings I have engaged in in my entire life. I’m sure all the parents out there can relate. It’s tough yet rewarding at the same time. The same people who make you want to scream and tear your hair out, melt your heart in an instant.I have always heard it said if you thought you knew love before, wait until you have a child. I can certainly attest to that 100 percent. So much so that I cannot fathom how anyone could intentionally cause harm to their own kids. That’s beyond my ability to comprehend.This brings me to the notion of our own parents. And this question is for those of us who have been fortunate to attain adulthood and still have our parents around… isn’t it interesting how the dynamic of your relationship with your parents evolves and changes over time? How you manage the balance between showing them respect, even fear(healthy) as your parents, seeking their advice on things, but yet becoming their guides in a changing world and for some even their caregivers. It’s as if you were becoming the parent to them, almost.(I also want to give a shout out to those who were raised by people other than biological parents. This post refers to those care givers as well).A childhood friend of mine reached out to me this week about a surprise birthday event she was…

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