August 2017 - Diary of a Jamerican Mom

You got to ac-cent-tchu-ate the positive
E-lim-i-nate the negative
And latch on to the affirmative
Don’t mess with mister in-between

You got to spread joy up to the maximum
Bring gloom down to the minimum
Have faith, or pandemonium
Liable to walk upon the scene

I know I will date myself for doing this but I remember watching this program called Homefront on TV back in Jamaica when I was growing up(back then we used to get the shows after they were done with them in the US or England). The verses above are from the theme song for that program. It’s been many, many years but that song has stuck with me to this day. You don’t really have to go beyond the first 2 lines of the song; accentuate the positive – eliminate the negative. Basically the message is to focus on that positive aspects of life and reduce the negativity.

Have some fun! Listen here

Have you ever met some people(or you might be one of them) who all they can focus on is what’s wrong, or what won’t happen instead of focusing on what’s right and what could happen? People who focus on negative outcomes instead of the positive possibilities? Or what they don’t want instead of what they want? Who would rather spread discord rather than peace? Those who feel they have to comment or react to every little issue rather than trying to find positive solutions to correct them?

I am sure you all can relate, we either interact with these personalities daily or we are those people.

Here are my thoughts on how to remain(or become) positive in most circumstances. Please bear in mind this is from my own personal experience and may not be applicable to all. However I am sure there will be a few take-aways for most of you.

Focus more on what you want(not what you don’t want)

This is a basic concept of science(like attracts like). We have to operate in the realm of what’s positively possible. If we try to avoid something, we somehow attract that very thing. No wonder some people practice the power of positive affirmations daily so they can set the tone for a good day. We attract what we focus on. For example, you shouldn’t be saying “I don’t want to be in debt” but rather “I want to be debt free”. Semantics, maybe but it’s a drastic mindset shift that takes place with a simple change. “I don’t want to be in debt” focusses on the problem, that you don’t have enough money. On the other hand, “I want to be debt free” says I will focus on what it takes to be what I want; being debt-free.

This doesn’t mean saying a bunch of mumbo jumbo like “I’m rich, I am going to have a million dollars in my account by Friday”. It simply means expecting abundance, knowing that you are worthy, believing in yourself to manifest it. Somehow that turns a switch on subconsciously that it can happen; and it will. Now I don’t believe that this happens magically but the mindset shift turn into actions which support the positive outlook. I had a friend who always used to say to me “Positive vibrations bring positive results”. Sounds like Bob Marley’s song but it makes a whole lot of sense. Obviously Bob Marley was on to something there.

On the parenting front, I see it everyday with my son. You want him to make a positive change, you give him props for what he has done. And use that as encouragement for the things he needs to improve on. Not the other way around.

Don’t mess with Mr In-between(Don’t sit on the fence)

This is a message for myself as well. While we are focusing our attention on what we want(as opposed to what we don’t want), focusing on what it would feel like if we already have the positive situation, we should try not to focus on the what-if it doesn’t happen scenario. We have to be convincingly positive in our minds and stay that way. Now this is not to say that negative situations will not arise, but it’s all in how we handle that situation that will affect us.

This is easier said than done of course, but I really believe that you FAITH will be the source of strength to remain positive. I find that people who do not have the strong backing of their faith to help them through tough times tend to remain in the land of negativity about any and all circumstances that life throws at them

Spread Joy

Now, I wondered if it was coincidence that I read several LinkedIn posts this week about people who have been able to spread joy to others in unexpected ways simply by engaging with strangers. Two of them were people who were able to help others that were down on their luck in their job searches. If any of you have ever experienced what that feels like you know what I mean.

In one instance, one person was met a gentleman on a flight, heading back from home from a job interview. They struck up a conversation, which evolved into an interview(unbeknownst to the guy who needed the job). Amidst vulnerable moments, even tears, the guy who was down on his luck poured it all out. Turns out he was speaking with someone who had the power to hire him and was looking for what he had to offer. He was hired on the spot, earning more money than he did in his last job!! What an awesome way to spread joy!

There are lots of lessons in this encounter but I will focus on our ability to make positive impact on other people’s lives. Sometimes what may seem insignificant or small to you can have a huge impact on someone else. A simple “Good Morning” or a compliment can change the course of a person’s day. No telling what it can do for you too. I firmly believe in the mantra “The good you do comes back to you”…. the bad as well.

Thank you for spending time with me today, sharing my thought on positivity. I hope you found it helpful. Please feel free to share your thoughts and experiences with me as well.

This is the land of my birth, this is Jamaica, my Jamaica, the land of my birth -Eric Donaldson

There is just something about this little island, set in the Caribbean sea. Jamaica is just a dot on the map compared to the rest of the world – that’s what we were taught in school. As children we wondered, how come! We’ve got so much going on here. Just didn’t make sense! Until we were introduced to the world map. Perspective is everything!

As our Independence day approaches, I won’t lie, I always get a little nostalgic. I ALWAYS miss the vibe, the celebrations, the events, everything about it. This holiday ranks up there with Christmas for me. I can’t even explain it as my words cannot do justice to the way I feel. Share with me “my Jamaica”; memories of independence celebrations.

Family Gatherings on Independence Day

This was a given. It is probably no different from what happens in most places in the world for any major national holiday when people are off work. I remember my entire family; aunts, uncles, cousins, extended family would gather at my grandmother’s house in the hills of St Catherine(In Jamaica we call rural areas “country”). To put this all in context, my grandmother had a modest 3 bedroom house, no electricity at the time and no running water. Despite all of that, it was one of my happy places.

Jamaica’s National Dish – Ackee and Saltfish

On Independence morning, my mother would try to get is there as early as she could. Of course, we wanted to partake of that real country breakfast of chocolate tea made with coconut milk, freshly boiled on that wood fire in the outdoor kitchen , you know the type with the grease floating on the top? To round that out, we would have ackee and saltfish(our national dish), made from ackee freshly picked from her trees. Not to mention the roast breadfruit to go with it.

While we were finishing up breakfast, the men from the community would be preparing the “meat” for dinner. I apologize to the non-meat eaters and vegans in advance… but we would actually have fresh meat that day. Personally I could not look at that poor goat or pig whose life would be sacrificed for the feast, but it is what it is.

The radio would be blasting festival songs from years past and the vibe was just right. We would be walking around the property, partaking of fresh fruit from the trees, playing games with my other cousins. The adults would be playing dominoes; some recalling various hilarious family incidents from the past and just sharing stories with us. Stories that had shaped who we were.

My uncle “P”, was the comedian of the family. He had the funniest stories and the delivery is what made it so unique. My aunt(the oldest of my mother’s sisters) was always so industrious. She had an extremely keen memory. She shared some truly legendary stories. Things and times have changed and they are no longer with us but we have the memories.

Festival Song Competition

I’m not sure but this might be a little unique to Jamaica, but in the months leading up to Independence, we have a Festival Song competition. The competition has evolved over the years but when I was growing up, all entries had to have certain characteristics to qualify. There were a few competitors who had that formula down pat! We always anticipated those top ten finalists with their catchy beats. By the time we were going off on summer holidays from school, the songs would make their way to the airwaves. It was amazing how fast we would catch on to our favorites. Old and young alike. The vibe was electric. Other popular artists had to share the spotlight or be sidelined during those summer months.

They would have road shows across the island providing entertainment for the people. While I was too young to be allowed to attend these shows I would watch on TV with my family. Enjoying it just as much. Eric Donaldson, The Astronauts, Roy Rayon, Toots Hibbert, Ras Karbi, Tinga Stewart, Stanley and the Turbines…just to name a few.

When time came for the finals, everybody had their favorite. We would watch with bated breath to find out the winner. Oh how I miss that. Many times I fell asleep just before it ended. The next morning(usually a Sunday) suspense would get the better of me. I would be dying to find out who won (P.S. there was no internet to google).

In 1987 we were celebrated 25 years of independence. Roy Rayon won with his song “Give Thanks and Praises”. Saints and sinners alike were singing this one. Church people took to it like bees to honey. Oh the memories lol…

Share a few of my favorites here!

Grand Gala

Grand Gala was special! Although I don’t recall ever attending in person it was the highlight of the celebrations. It was usually televised so people from across the island could partake. This was a showcase of all kinds of performances depicting out culture pre- and post-independence. Music, dance, poetry, food, national symbols. For those who don’t know, itty-bitty Jamaica is culturally rich. We maintain our culture, we celebrate it and we pass it on. Despite all our challenges as a nation, this is one thing we have gotten right. It is what makes us who we are today and what makes us unique and fascinating to the rest of the world.

Legends like Bob Marley, Usain Bolt are all part and parcel of who and what we celebrate during independence. It’s the Jamaican pride. I can’t explain it. I plan to take my family back to Jamaica during the summer to experience it.

Floats/Parades

On Independence day as well, we would have float parades throughout the streets of Kingston culminating at the National Stadium. The stadium only seats about 30,000 but was always jammed to capacity. People would line the streets, to see the parades; young, old, uptown, downtown. It brought the entire country together. Our beauty queens and other local celebrities would be transported in classic cars during the parade. Floats depicting different aspects of Jamaican life or history would be on display, the military, our constabulary force, anything uniquely Jamaican. Just fun times…

There are so many memories to share but if I continue this post would be way too long. Maybe you can share with me some of your own memories of Independence. I would love to hear them.

Month: August 2017

Ac-cent-tchu-ate the positive(Accentuate The Positive)